Salam. I know you answered this and said it will attract men. Men’s colognes attract women too. Why is it that women’s desires are always ignored and everything is done to benefit the man? I will not wear it out but I don’t know why I should have to deal with Muslim men who wear it and are not sinning for it. I cannot control what kuffar do and will just have to say astaghfar, but it disturbs me that Muslim men can tempt muslim and kafir women and it is considered ok. Jazak Allah khair
All praise be to Allah, and may His blessings and peace be on His last messenger, Muhammad,
Firstly, I must say that we should accept the commands of Allah and His messenger. It is better to do that and fall in sin out of weakness than to avoid the sin while resenting the command.
Secondly, Allah says,
“وَعَسَىٰ أَن تَكْرَهُوا شَيْئًا وَهُوَ خَيْرٌ لَّكُمْ وَعَسَىٰ أَن تُحِبُّوا شَيْئًا وَهُوَ شَرٌّ لَّكُمْ وَاللَّهُ يَعْلَمُ وَأَنتُمْ لَا تَعْلَمُونَ.”
“But perhaps you hate a thing and it is good for you; and perhaps you love a thing and it is bad for you. And Allah Knows, while you know not.” [Sahih International, 2:216]
Think about how much people disagree amongst themselves over all kinds of matters because one group can’t see the point in their opponents’ arguments. This means that many of them may not see Allah’s wisdom concerning many matters. The faithful will, in such case, hold on to their belief in the ultimate wisdom of Allah. Once one is certain of the veracity of the message, they must accept the details, because many people by necessity won’t be able to comprehend the Divine wisdom in every teaching. Being able to escape the grip of our personal and cultural biases is part of what submission to the Divine (Islam) is about.
Thirdly, I will attempt to explain what I could understand concerning the wisdom behind allowing men to wear perfume while barring women from doing so (in public). If you disagree with all of my rationales below, defer to the wisdom of God whose messenger conveyed these rules to us.
You need to understand that Islam is a complete way of life, and at times, the wisdom of something is not fully appreciated because it is practiced in isolation from the rest of its value system. For example, men are required to go out and make a living for themselves and their women. Women are not required to do the same, even though they are not prevented from proper work when they desire to. The restrictions that women have on their attire and other aspects of their behavior are in harmony with their being the guardians of chastity and sexual morality and that homemaking is their primary role in the society.
Men are the ones predominantly involved in physical work that will make them sweat and smell bad, making their need for using perfume greater. (You don’t see a lot of women working in construction.)
Women have a greater control of their sexual drive than men. This is a conventional wisdom and it is also supported by some scientific data, even though science itself is hard to cite in these matters. It can be manipulated at every step from the application for grants, to study designs, to publishing, etc.
Please review the statistics of rape in the USA and the percentage of those committed by women against men. It is not for the benefit of men only to reduce the chances of their temptation. It is for the benefit of women and the entire society. This is like polygamy in a sense. It is not for the benefit of men. We see that men in cultures that don’t practice it still have multiple partners. The difference here is that those women partners in the case of polygamy have rights like legitimate wives and their husbands have duties they must discharge towards them.
The truth seekers are those who can move away from their egoistic self-consciousness. Only then they can rid themselves of many layers of biases. This is extremely difficult for us and in some respects impossible. However, we can all defer to the wisdom of God.
Allah knows best.